Stranger in my bed

yourstrulymandismith

There is a stranger in my bed.
I tried to believe you.
Just like you wanted, like you said.
To believe in what I say, the familiarity of you, takes my breath away.
No more examples of voices in my head.
Clenching hands.
Controlling strokes, good vibes, we toast to.
it is only me and you,
between these sheets.
The stranger that takes.
Feeds my soul and fills me up only to break, me.
When I look at you. I look deep in you.
Can you feel me? I can feel you too.
I see that you are, you are different every time.
Your Expressions do not shift, your mannerisms are your own.
Who are you tonight?
Its darkness and you gleam in shady light.
The touch of you gives me pleasure,
I fear nothing, you are my endeavor.
Subject of you, let me in
if anything, it is the…

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Stranger in my bed

There is a stranger in my bed.
I tried to believe you.
Just like you wanted, like you said.
To believe in what I say, the familiarity of you, takes my breath away.
No more examples of voices in my head.
Clenching hands.
Controlling strokes, good vibes, we toast to.
it is only me and you,
between these sheets.
The stranger that takes.
Feeds my soul and fills me up only to break, me.
When I look at you. I look deep in you.
Can you feel me? I can feel you too.
I see that you are, you are different every time.
Your Expressions do not shift, your mannerisms are your own.
Who are you tonight?
Its darkness and you gleam in shady light.
The touch of you gives me pleasure,
I fear nothing, you are my endeavor.
Subject of you, let me in
if anything, it is the mask, that you came with.
Take it off.
Show me who you are.
I want to know the real you.
(Elevate.)
Piece by piece.
Breaking down the walls.
I want you naked, all clothes off.
Release you, stranger in my bed.
In my head.
Confess to me, do not leave it in.
(Sin, Sin, Sin.)
Why do you want to confuse me?
Why can’t you just tell me?
What you want? (who you are?)
Take it down, I will pick you up.
Its you and me stranger in my bed.
Why must you take it all and lock in every brick of this room.
I will hammer it down while you are laying in my bed.
Wash you from all of it no more need to hide.
I will find out all that I want, then all of you, will then be mine.
I need you, release you, find it inside.
Soul search, church.
I want it all, you are all mine, stranger in my bed.

All this is for

Try to figure out what all of this is for. If I’d only knew my madness would subside . I’d finally feel alright. Or would I ? Would it be so substantial that I would drop to my knees. I’d like to be whisked away to a beach somewhere . Somewhere tropic . White beaches and clear waters. Sip and toast to what will come. So I can know what all of this was for. Where is the end I ask? Everyday ! Feeling that today could be the day that my blindness fades. No longer in a rushed world, starring Mandi smith as Helen Keller. I can feel oh how I can feel the brail beneath my fingertips . Shall I wake to finally know what all of this is for. Wake up,they say wake up girl! Come here to my door, become who you are destined to be . Let me be free now . Please I beg let me be free. Why must I wear this super woman costume with a super human mind. It all flows so nicely it is just a little bit scary. So emotional with out being told. I know now I now know more . Please tell me what is it for anyway.

Time

What the fuck is time anyway. Some believe time is not conceivable though we follow a clock all day long. Tick tick as the hours pass. My clock is empty,how about your clock glass. Today the supposed time flys by. What is time, if your time is not mine? Get to work you’re loosing time. It’s all in how you use your time. Value fucking time. I like to think that the whole space mine bending of the earth grid is true. Cycling backwards to see where time has been. What could I do? Or possibly, I would peddle forward in to this preposterous time. Would I then be immortal or will my age define my travels. Who knows, I’d like to. Rewind!

10/26/17

I think back in time every moment becomes tricky. What memories are mine? What is so special about me? I am not talking about myself recognizing self. I am talking about why is everything such a big deal. What do you all know that I do not know. Is this show new? Nope, I do not think so. My mind is starting recognize face. Call it human facial recognition. I am growing into myself figuring who I am, to all of you and myself. Self merging, clash of own. Self merging between lessons learned. A thought of memories. What is the common denominator here? Las Vegas is weird. Underground world of transformation. Sitting in the garage reading and writing and shit. All the shit I like to do. Reflecting on weird shit. Red lights showing me recording. Watch my activity , what’s new? I look to my right and I see you the one from the pictures. Sitting right on top of my dresser. Thinking back to Easter and you waddling around in the grass when you walk fast . Whatever this shit is it is complicated. Languages in reading and writing and shit. I’m watching you . Shirt off. I remember that chest. I look you up and down. I am attracted to you in a strong way. You walk away and here comes the duck. I realized out of all the mother fuckers around here dressing up in disguise. Some are women. Some with hair slicked back just how I like it. Logically using to much hair product. I can’t talk to you . I do not know you . I am starring hard with built up anger in side. I’m angry. What the fuck who ever you are? You know me and I know you well. I look away and back to you . You’re caught. Now I am a joke . All love lost.